Saturday, November 8, 2008

My New Obamaccount

I am so excited! Thrilled! Elated! In January, after the inauguration of Obama, I will have my new Obamaccount that will pay my mortgage AND miraculously fill my gas tank. It's like the loaves and fishy thing all over again! And that was something that I just read about in the Bible. But this is real, it's now and so fantastic!

I'm compiling lists of things to do with all the extra cash I'll be saving once Obama is paying off my mortgage and keeping the big black beast all gassed up. Oh wait! I'm not going to have any extra dollars because my taxes will be higher! I guess that's okay. I mean, I shouldn't be selfish. Instead, I'll willingly give my money to Obama because he is much more enlightened than I and will know better how to spend the money I earn.

For a long time I felt that paying tithing, saving for Katherine's college and using my resources for good, charitable purposes, and of course selfish things like getting my hair cut or buying deodorant, were noble and necessary. Maybe I was wrong. I suppose I can cut my own hair (at least the front) and isn't it tres European to stink just a little? When I lift my arms and take a whiff I'll be reminded that some poor soul who has been oppressed and cannot work definitely needs the cash more than I do. Who am I to judge if someone needs their ciggies, Jack Daniel, cable TV, and acrylic nails? Really I should count my blessings that I don't have addiction to substances (legal ones, anyway, I really never have tried drugs so how would I know) and that my nails are so brittle from rounds of chemo that acrylic nails won't stick to my deformed nailbeds.

It's been really HARD to work at a job for all the 6 years I've been battling metastatic breast cancer so I could have the health insurance to cover the treatment costs. But there are others who have it worse than I do. I mean, I know a person who is going on disability because she gets headaches. That's got to be tough. I say, "Obama! You take care of my friend with the headaches! And while you're at it, give her good medical coverage, and make it better than mine because I've been soooo greedy!"

That's why I'm so glad that Obama will be making those decisions instead of someone like me. He's such a gift to the world. Whenever he speaks its like a beautiful wrapped package, all sparkly with perfectly creased corners on the paper, and the gift inside is his words. The supreme one warms us all with his soothing voice and the gentle lift at the end of his phrases seems to release thousands of people from the force of gravity. His words are so beautiful and yet so powerful that people (and not just ordinary people, Oprah-types, too) cry tears, buckets of tears.

I cry too. I don't expect to stop crying for about, let's see, 4 years!

6 comments:

Sant Family said...

This is excellent! I am totally going to link this on my blog!

Can I go on disability? I must have something. Maybe Larry does too. Thank goodness for Obama. Now all our troubles are gone!

Kent said...

Wow, you have given me great hope (see negitave comments on Tifani's blog). Let me see, I am over 60!!! and.....no wait my wife is still working so we can aford health insurance, so I guess that she will be able to stop and all you "young people" and "rich people" will support me and I can just buy a new motorhome and tour the USA at the very least.
Thank you all you hard working upper middleclass people for making this possible for us "old and poor folk".

Love your post. Since you moved we miss your SS lessons when we visit. Hope you are doing well.
Kent Hathaway

Larsens said...

Like Rod said, next he will promise that the sun will rise from the west.

Reno 411 said...

Holy Cow, I couldn't have said it better myself. In fact I may use some of what you said on my blog. That was amazing. All the po people are so happy he is won so they can get mo money.

Laura said...

Well said!

chloe's clan said...

Well, at least some people out there broke their rose colored glasses handed out by the Obama campaign! I seriously have to wonder where we will all be in 4 years?